It is a love which is not in spite of flaws but because of those flaws. It is love that does not demand anything and does not expect anything, though not blind. It means helping a loved one, even with self-improvement, only when clearly asked to.
This kind of love excludes bullying those close to us for their own good.
In human relations, unconditional love is the love of a mother for a handicapped child. But even that love is not always ideal. It is only ideal when it comes from feelings of the heart and not from feelings of duty.
What opportunities for development does the new wave of civilization bring, in an epoch of abundance in material goods? Can we learn to love in the absence of basic material concerns?
Our present habits of thought, our moral norms, our tendency to constantly judge others, our readiness to characterize another person as lazy, irresponsible and egotistical will all be difficult to change.
A mother who laments that her son has quit his job again because his boss didn’t treat him with respect — is judging her son harshly. She says, “my son is a layabout”. Her son’s fight for his self-respect does not gain her acceptance. In her opinion, responsibility for the family is more important — ensuring the sustenance of the family, regardless of the price of humiliation.
The upcoming era will free us of moral dilemmas like these.
A father, a violin virtuoso, will stop forcing his less-talented son to practice for hours on end. The son will be freed from fear of his father’s disapproval and disappointment, and from fear of unfulfilled expectations.
Presently, a true man of success knows the extent to which circumstances influenced his accomplishments, as well as luck in meeting the right people, and being in the right place at the right time. In spite of this knowledge, he demands similar accomplishments from his son.
The new civilization frees us from forced work and allows a father to love and admire his son, who writes poetry poorly and does not have a paying job. The happiness of a father coming merely from the fact that the son is provided for, and a situation where society does not condemn him or his son are not ideas which are generally understood now. The unconditional love of a father as looks at his smiling son develops both of them spiritually. What does it matter if the son sought for a long time to find his path, a different path than his father’s, if he kept his dignity and feelings of self-worth?
Love – do not judge.
Help – do not interfere.
Do not offer yourself as an example. After all, you are not so perfect yourself.
Social dividends free a parent from fears that their child “will take the wrong path”. The child will not steal, escape to alcohol in the face of disapproval, and will not stumble morally.
Everyone will have a chance to find his own path and to realize his potential. There will be no losers, because everyone has their own abilities.